This, that, and the other

  Kira and Kolten

I brought Kira and Kolten, her neighbor friend, with me to Wal-mart yesterday.  When kids are in the backseat of the car and I'm in the front it's like they forget I'm there or they think I can't hear them because normally Kolten is silent around grown-ups.  Ten year-olds talk in a series of rapid non-sequiturs.  Here's an example of their conversation:

Kira - Maybe I'll get some new flip-flops.
Kolten - My foot is the exact same size as our digital TV remote.
Kira - I'm going to buy a fish today.
Kolten - I'm going to buy a pufferfish.
Kira - My cousin is saving her money to buy a pygmy elephant.
Kolten - What's a pygmy?
Kira - I don't know but I think it's something small.
Kolten - Camaros are my favorite kind of car.
Kira - Do you like wiener-dogs? 
Kolten - How many fish do you think I should get?
Kira - How much money do you have?
Kolten - I don't think my mom would like if I got fish.
Kira - When we get in there let's run wild.
Kolten - Have you ever had pigs in a blanket?

And on and on.  I pretended I didn't hear a word they were saying and when we got to Wal-mart I told them, "Okay, here's the rules: No fish and no running wild."  They both looked at me like I was some sort of wizard, and Kira said, "How ...?"

Kids aren't very smart.

Today we got up early and drove to Floodwood because they were having a chicken swap.  They didn't have much there.  A few little goats, a bunch of different kinds of birds, free kittens, some rabbits and some puppies.  Not the best swap I've ever been to.  Of course Kira and I wanted to get a new puppy, but Mitch said no, which I see the wisdom in now that I'm home and don't have my judgment clouded by milk-breath and loose puppy skin.  Do I really want to spend the rest of my summer cleaning up someone else's crap?  No.  I guess I don't.  But man, were they ever cute.  They looked a lot like this but they were just a little cuter:

They were also celebrating Catfish Days in Floodwood, but it's not much of a celebration.  There was a street blocked off and a bunch of food wagons and that's about it.  They didn't even have any catfish, which was weird, but they did have mini-donuts and that made the trip worth it.

Chicken Swap

This morning I got the family up bright and early so we could go to the Carlton County Chicken Swap. It's exactly what it sounds like, except there are all kinds of animals, food, cages and stuff to swap as well as chickens. We didn't get anything this morning because I DON'T HAVE A COOP YET, but it was fun to look. We saw a rooster that was easily 30 pounds. It had only one eye and it was scarred all over its body. What kind of animal is tough enough to go that many rounds with a seasoned rooster? Whatever it was it is probably dead now. That rooster was free of charge. I liked it, but it was shooting death lasers at Sam through its one good eye and clicking it's terrifying spurs together so I thought better of it.

This isn't the rooster that I saw, but it was almost this big.

I saw a goat that was no bigger than a schnauzer. I told Mitch it would be nice to have a house-goat and as I was saying it, the little goat crapped a million pebble sized turds as though in cahoots with Mitch to prove to me that goats aren't good house pets. I would love to hear the clippity clop of little hooves on the kitchen floor in the morning. I also saw a goat with one horn. I think that is technically a unicorn.

The house-goat wasn't swinging,
but it was every bit as cute as this one.

I also saw a woman walking around on crutches and she was carrying a catheter bag and the hose was snaked up her pant leg. I don't think the chicken swap is the best place for the medically vulnerable. She was buying a pony.