Memorial Day

Some of my favorite people in the world are American veterans from past, present, (and future).  Both of my grandfather's served in WWII.

That's my grandpa on the right.  He served in the infantry in Italy and Algeria.  He was a company clerk.

My other grandpa was a cook for his company.  He loved to cook.  He always made us big pancake breakfasts.

That's both my grandpas on the left and both my grandma's on the right.  I know you always wondered how I got so good looking.  Now you know.

My dad was in the navy during the Vietnam war, but thankfully he never had to go overseas.  He was a welder and said that he made a number of bbq grills out of airplane parts for the officers.

I couldn't find a picture of my dad from the navy, but I did find this one from when he was an acolyte in the Episcopal church.  He looked almost the same when he was in the navy.

There. But instead of the cross I wanted to put a gun or a welder thingy but they didn't have those stickers on Photobucket.

My sister Beth was in the navy too but I also don't have a picture of her in her uniform.  She looked pretty cute in it.  Instead I'll post this cute picture of her:

My sister Amy is currently serving in Afghanistan.  She comes home next month.

And of course, my favorite non-relative veteran is George Washington.

He is the original American veteran.

Thank you for your service, Veterans!

Y is for Yikes, I got some major blisters on my feet

When I was in Washington this last week I did a LOT of walking.  In my everyday life I don't do a lot of walking around.  Everywhere I go is a drive-to place so walking isn't exactly a means of transportation around here.  But cities, on the other hand, require a lot of walking, which I love.  I like the idea of walking to a train station, taking the train to somewhere in the approximate area of where you want to be and then hoofing it the rest of the way.  I think walking around is the best way to get a feel for a place.  When my sisters and I were in New York I insisted we walk from Battery Park to our hotel in Midtown.  It was a long walk, but we saw a LOT of stuff that way.  I went on a bus tour of the monuments the first time I went to Washington and it was cool and everything, but I didn't know where things were in relation to each other.  So since then, I've walked wherever I want to go when I'm there.

The only down side to walking miles and miles is that my poor feet aren't used to it.  I think my shoes must not fit right because I got two enormous, excruciating blisters on the back/bottom of my heels.  If you've ever had a cracked heel, it's like that but worse.  Deeper somehow.

I knew that during my visit Saturday was probably the only day that wouldn't be raining, so I wanted to do all my outside sight seeing that day.  I took the metro to the Mall and spent about six hours looking at the following things:

The Sculpture Garden

The National Archives.  I went in to look at the Constitution again, but there was a HUGE line, so I looked at the Magna Carta and skipped the rotunda.

Washington Monument

The Martin Luther King Jr. memorial which was amazing because to get to it, you have to go through a path made through a big boulder:

and it says this on the side of the King sculpture:

The part part of the rock that is missing from the path is the part that MLK is on, and it's moved ahead of the main boulder, forging a path.  Amazing.  

Then I walked around the Tidal Pool and made friends with this duck.  He probably just followed me because I look like the kind of person that has some food on her, but I choose to believe he really liked me.

Jefferson Monument

George Mason memorial.  Father of the Bill of Rights.  He was part of the Constitutional Convention but he refused to sign it because it didn't include a bill of rights.  He was neighbors with George Washington.

I walked past the Bureau of Engraving and Printing but didn't go in because they aren't open on Saturdays.  Otherwise I would be able to go in and take a tour and make some of my own money as a souvenir.

I walked by the Holocaust Museum, but didn't go in that day.  I went in a few days later.  Totally depressing.

I saw this guy playing bucket drums on the boulevard.  I heard him from a long way away and I would have never in a million years guessed that someone could make buckets sound like that.

I stopped at the American History Museum to look at George Washington's uniform and the Zeus statue one more time, and then I had a little lunch before going to the portrait gallery.

I saw this picture of Bill Clinton.  It's huge and is made of little squares with colored shapes inside of them.  When you step back, voila: Bill Clinton.

I also saw this crazy horse made from bottle caps. I love his teeth.
Lol, you silly horse.

Then I headed back to Amy's because my feet hurt.  I think I probably covered about 15 miles.  That's the day I got the blisters and they got worse and festered by the last day.  Ouchie.

The next day I went to the National Cathedral which involved a mile and a half walk from the nearest Metro station, uphill, in the rain, with my blisters.  When I got there I took my camera out to take pictures of the amazing gargoyles and stained glass windows and discovered I forgot my camera battery that I so thoughtfully and responsibly took out to charge the night before.  Crap. It was such a cool place, it was worth the rain, blisters, uphilliness, and lack of camera battery.

Oh, one more thing: Why doesn't John Adams have a monument in Washington?  He's one of the big three founders of our country and he doesn't even have anything.  That blows.

X is for not a lot of things that I want to write about

I went to Mount Vernon on Tuesday.  It was wonderful.  Actually, at first it was kind of annoying because I got there at the same time as about 15 school groups.  I went through the house in the middle of one of those stupid groups.  It was crowded and LOUD.  Annoying.

Look at that line.  Ugh.

Then I decided that most of those groups would be there and gone in the morning so I walked down to the wharf and pioneer farm and kicked around down there for a while. Most of the school groups were staying at the mansion and at the barns so I was out of the crowd anyway.  I met a docent in the replica slave cabin who was answering questions for people.

When I got there he was telling a few ladies about slave-life on Mount Vernon, and then those ladies left and it was just me and him.  I asked him how he knows all that he knows and he told me his personal story of learning about George Washington and falling madly in love with him (he didn't exactly say it that way.) It was a total George Washington geek/love fest.  I could have talked to him all day, but I only stayed until more people came and wanted to ask him questions.

Then I went to pioneer farm and walked around a little.

That's the sixteen sided threshing barn back there.  They put the wheat stalks on the floor and then horses come in and stomp it by running around the circle and the wheat kernels fall through the cracks in the floor and the workers collect it and then sift it and the seeds fall out of their shells and viola, wheat seeds.  Oh, George, you were so smart.

Then I went to the wharf on the Potomac to kill some more time until the school groups left.

I saw that big boat and asked about it and apparently they give tours every forty five minutes that take you around the river in front of the mansion a bit, and down the river far enough to see D.C. in the distance.  I got on with a family of hillbillies.  I know they were hillbillies because they talked and looked like hillbillies.  There was a chain-smoking mom and dad, and five boys between the ages of 8 and 12.  When the tour started everyone went on the top deck to see the sights and listen to the tour guide.  The stupid hillbilly kids were running around playing tag and yelling so loud and being so obnoxious we couldn't hear the tour.  Their parents were no where to be seen and nobody else was saying anything so I told them to stop running around and be quiet.  What?  Somebody had to do it.  They didn't stop running around but they were quiet.  No, I didn't trip them when they ran past me, but I considered it.  Pretty soon they left the upper deck and it was peaceful and we saw the mansion from the river.

Nice huh?

When we were pulling back up to the pier, I noticed that there was an osprey nest on some of the pilings.  I know it was an osprey because the guy I said, "Hey, look at that big bird!  What kind is it?"  He said it was an osprey and who am I to argue?

Can you see her in the middle?  She's kind of looking out at us like, "Hey, get the eff away from my nest, you rubbernecks."

By that time it was afternoon so I decided it was safe to go back up to the main part of the estate.  It was safe.  Most of the school groups were gone.  

For some reason, I'm extremely interested in the outhouses.  Here is a picture of the back of one:

See those little brown doors?  Those open up so the lucky lucky slaves could periodically go in and empty the catch basins so that they didn't have to dig big holes and move the bathrooms when they got full.  People would go to the bathroom either in there, or if it was the middle of the night or winter or something, they used chamber pots.  Yuck.  Here's a view of the inside of the bathroom:

Yeah, that's right, three holes.  HOW could anyone do that?  I wouldn't want to poop simultaneously, in the same room as anyone, even George Washington.  So I asked myself a Would You Rather question:  Would I rather not meet George Washington (I know he's dead), or magically meet someone who has been dead for 200 years BUT I could only talk to him while we were both pooping in his three-hole outhouse.  It's a tough one.  I think I'd rather not meet him.  

I thought I should go on the mansion tour one more time since I probably won't be back for a long time.  I am so glad I did.  I was practically alone.  I got to talk to the docents about stuff and when I got to the end, in GW's study, where he spent so much of his time, the docent stepped out and I WAS TOTALLY ALONE IN GEORGE WASHINGTON'S STUDY!  No, YOU shut up!  It was so fabulous, it was just me and his presidential chair and desk, and his books and his pictures and everything.  I'm really glad I decided to go through the house again.  I don't have pics of the inside because we aren't allowed to take pictures inside, so too bad for you.  I guess you'll have to go see for yourself.  

Then I went through the museum and educational center and shops.  I bought a lot of stuff.  It was a great day.  It's one of my favorite places in the world.  

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ATTENTION!!!!

SYLVIA NEY is So... what else?'s ONE HUNDREDTH MEMBER!  YAAAAYYYY, SYLVIA!!!!  You win the give-away of one of my cheap magnets from the So... what else? store.  Sylvia, email me at pluvial124@gmail.com and tell me which one you want (or I could just surprise you) and tell me where you want it sent.  

Thanks to Sylvia and all the people who come here and see what I'm up to every day!  I really appreciate you guys!  

My Last GW Fun Fact (for now)

President's Week pretentious fun fact!: This is the last day of our week of presidential fun facts.  I can tell you loved it by ALL the comments that are clogging up my server (sarcasm).  Awwww...  So we will end on a sad note so you don't miss it too much.

George Washington died when he was 67 years old.  He was retired from political life and spent his days riding around overseeing his farms.  One night he complained of a sore throat, but it didn't seem serious.  Early the next morning he woke Martha and told her he was feeling terribly sick.  She wanted to get up and call a doctor, but he didn't want her to.  He didn't want her to catch a cold (considerate dreamboat) so she waited until morning and then summoned help.  Several doctors came to administer aid to Washington during the day.  GW was having trouble breathing and talking so the doctors bled him, TWICE.  It didn't help (obviously) and Washington asked not to be bled again, but they did anyway (doctor's NEVER listen!).  He was bled again.  They took 35% of his blood volume in all the bleedings.  Nobody knows for sure, but there is speculation that Washington had epiglottitis which is a serious infection of the throat that cuts off airflow to the lungs.  Washington kept getting worse, and was suffering horribly.  One of the doctors suggested a tracheotomy which would have restored his breathing, but he was overruled by the other doctors because back then there was no anesthesia (ow) and they didn't want to cause the president more suffering.  According to Tobias Lear, Washington's personal secretary, this was his last exchange:

"I am just going. Have me decently buried; and do not let my body be put into the Vault in less than three days after I am dead." I [Lear] bowed assent, for I could not speak. He then looked at me again and said, "Do you understand me? I replied "Yes." "Tis well" said he.


He died shortly after "without a struggle or a sigh" (according to Lear).  Sad huh? 


There was a doctor named William Thorton who came to Mount Vernon the day after Washington died and proposed attempting a reanimation.  He thought with a tracheotomy, an infusion of lambs blood and gradual thawing, the president could be brought back to life.  Martha vetoed the plan.  

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That's it for President's Week!  Tomorrow I will have a new header!  But if you find yourself missing George Washington, I've added a page on the blog with all my GW information. 

My Girls

I just got back from a quick trip to visit my parents and my sister and her daughters, Sid and Millie.

Sid, the three year old, is a BRAT, but she makes me laugh harder than anyone.  My mom told me a story about how one day Sid fell down the stairs.  She fell forward and was lying on the stairs on her stomach with her head facing down and her feet on the top step.  My mom was shocked that she fell and was on her way to ask if she was okay and help her up when she heard Sid say, "Grandma... Grandma... grab my feet."  She wouldn't move because she was afraid she would fall further and it cracks me up that she had a plan for my mom to save her while she was lying on her stomach on the steps.  I'm laughing even as I write this.  

A few weeks ago she got her first case of diarrhea since she has been potty trained.  She came out of the bathroom and told my mom, with her voice full of wonder, "I peepooped!"

Yesterday Sid was all hyped up and being obnoxious.  She was about to jump on Kira and Kira said, "Oh god."  And Sid cracked up laughing and ran up to me and told me "Kira called me 'OOOOHHHGAAAAA!" and then ran to the bedroom where my sister was changing Millie and yelled into the room "Kira called me OOOOHHGAAAAAA!" and then she shut the light off and shut the door.  Beth had just taken Millie's diaper off so the baby was lying on the bed half naked and suddenly they were both thrust into total darkness.   Why do I think that is so funny?

Beth is trying to teach Sid the concept of time-outs for undesirable behavior.  She tells her that she has to stay in her room for her time-out until Beth comes back to get her.  Sid lies on her stomach in the hall with only her feet in her room and yells, "MOM, COME AND TALK TO ME!"

Sid thinks it is HILARIOUS to call me Amy and call Amy Sarah.  She's been doing that since she could talk, and we thought it was just an honest mistake, but it isn't.  She does it on purpose to stick it to us.  Yesterday she made me pretend she was a baby and put her in the crib for a nap.  Gladly, I thought.  When I got about two steps out of the room she started yelling, "AMY! COME AND GET THE BABY! AMY!  AMY!  AMY!  AMY!  AAAAAAAAMMMMMYYYYYY!!!!!!" So I yelled back, "Amy isn't here!"  and she laughed and laughed and said, "SARAH, COME AND GET THE BABY!"  So I went back in the room and she looked at me with her sweet little face and said, "Hi Amy!"  She's a brat.




President's Week pretentious fun fact!:  Washington was known for his incredible physical strength and dexterity (swoon).  At the end of the revolution told a friend that he never knew anyone who could throw a rock as far as he could. Once he threw a rock on top of the Natural Bridge in the Blue Ridge Mountains.  Here's the Natural Bridge:

Those tiny things at the bottom are people.  (It's really high.) Another time at Mount Vernon a group of young men were having a competition "throwing the bar" which I suppose is like a javelin.  Washington happened upon the young men who were stripped down, sweating, showing off, and asked where the furthest mark was.  He then grabbed the bar and flung it further than any of them without so much as removing his jacket.  He smiled and said, "When you beat my pitch, young gentlemen, I'll try again," and walked away.

Washington was also a fantastic horseman.  Preceding the Battle of Trenton, GW was riding up and down a column of soldiers on horseback and suddenly his horse slipped and started to fall backward down a steep, icy slope.  Washington locked his fingers into the horse's mane and hauled up its head by brute force.  He shifted his balance backward just enough to allow the horse to regain its footing.  The people that witnessed it were in awe.  Washington saw their stunned faces and said, "What? It's no biggy."  (no, he didn't.)  I saw Mitch do that on the lawn tractor once.  It really is impressive.

This has nothing to do with GW's strength, but I like it so I'm including it:  Ethan Allen (the man, not the furniture company) was captured by the British during the Revolution and he reported that the British had a picture of George Washington hung in their outhouse.  Allen supposedly said, "It is most appropriately hung. There is nothing that will make an Englishman shit so quick as the sight of General Washington."  

Happy Birthday, George Washington!

I don't have an actual post today, just my pretentious George Washington fun fact.

Oh yeah and this:

Happy George Washington's Birthday to YOU!

President's Week pretentious fun fact!:  Although he lived in a time before vaccinations or good medical care, George Washington was surprisingly resilient, physically.  He had many horrible diseases in his lifetime, including diptheria, smallpox, malaria, dysentery, tuberculosis, depression, quinsy, pneumonia, pleurisy, and a throat infection that eventually killed him when he was in his late sixties.

In the midst of the French and Indian war, while on a 100 mile trek (no roads) he was struck with dysentery.  General Braddock ordered him to go back but he refused.  It was so bad that he had to stop riding his horse and ride in a cart.  The diarrhea (and, I'm guessing, the resultant case of white-hot sting ring) caused hemorrhoids (another thing we have in common!❤ ) When he was well enough to ride again he put pillows on his saddle to ease the discomfort.  He wanted to lead his troops into the woods and engage the enemy but Braddock refused.  Eventually Washington was the only leader left during the battle.  He had two horses shot out from under him and had bullet holes in his hat and jacket, but didn't get shot. GW was the only person left able to distribute Braddock's orders and lead the retreat. Somehow Washington was able to ride 40 miles through darkness to summon reinforcements, though he occasionally had to crawl on his hands and knees to find the road. All while recovering from DYSENTERY. He later admitted that the ride left him "in a manner wholly unfit for the execution of the duty"  He lost a lot of weight and took a long time to recover, but he did.  Isn't he dreamy?

Winter Break Activities!

President's Week pretentious fun fact!:  George Washington did not have wooden teeth, Simone!  He did, however, have bad teeth and by the time he became president he only had one natural tooth left.  His dentist used this as an anchor for his barbaric dentures.  His dentures were made of lead (as pictured) or ivory, human teeth (gross), cow teeth (super gross), and springs.  Here's a picture:

That space in the back right side of the picture is where his natural tooth was.  The metal must have rubbed on that tooth relentlessly.  GW got to be friendly with his dentist (mistake) and when his last tooth fell out he gave it to this dentist who put it in a little glass case and put it on his watch fob (psychopath).

President's Week!

Why is George Washington all over this page, you ask?  Because it is his birthday on Wednesday and I'm nothing if not festive.  Also, George Washington is my boyfriend.  Read the books His Excellency George Washington by Joseph Ellis, or Washington: A Life by Ron Chernow and he will probably be your boyfriend too.  He was tall and quiet and dignified and incredibly brave, and he loved dogs and horses.  He had bad teeth, shot bald eagles for fun, and loved to be at home more than anywhere else.  It's like he was made for me.  Of course, there is the slave-owning thing, which is a constant wedge between the two of us.  I've been to Mount Vernon three times in the past couple years (is that braggy?)

Get out of my yard!

It is one of my favorite places in the world.  I would LOVE to have the place to myself for an entire weekend.  I would walk all over the parts that they don't let you walk on, I would snoop in every cupboard and drawer and pretend I lived there.  I think a weekend is all I could take though.  I need my running water, indoor toilets, and refrigeration.

The picture on the header is a portrait of Washington by Igor V. Babailov.

It is titled "My Beloved Country" ~ George Washington.  Babailov is a contemporary painter and based the portrait on the Houdon bust made in Washington's lifetime.

The Houdon bust

The Houdon bust is supposedly the most realistic replica of what Washington actually looked like.  Houdon visited Washington at Mount Vernon after the Revolutionary War, and made a life mask on which to base his sculpture. He followed Washington around for a few days to try to capture the essence of the man.  He said the expression on the face of the bust is based on the look Washington had on his face when he was negotiating the price of some horses and the seller gave him a price that was too high.  Washington just stared him down until the price was lowered.

Happy 280th Birthday, George Washington!

My boyfriends

Mitch kindly pointed out to me the other day that I have a lot of "boyfriends" and is that really appropriate for a married woman?  Well, I guess I do have a lot of boyfriends, but I can't help it.  The heart wants what the heart wants.  My boyfriends are mostly on TV or in movies, historical figures, and at the dentist office; so they are kind of unreachable mainly because the TV boyfriends and historical figures were in their prime decades, and even centuries ago; the movie boyfriends are too good for me; and I have dentophobia so I rarely see my dentist boyfriend. 

Here is a (not comprehensive) list of my current boyfriends:

1.  Michael Fassbender, i.e. Mr. Rochester/Magneto

2.  George Washington

3.  Lucas McCain

4.  Sully from Dr. Quinn

5.  Magnum P.I

6.  My dentist

Just kidding.  That's not really my dentist.  I did find a picture of him when I googled his name, but I'm not going to put that up here, or his name because what if he googled himself and saw that I included him in my list of boyfriends?  I would DIE.  Besides, he likes Mitch more than he likes me anyway.  I went in when I had a toothache in the third tooth away from my front teeth, and he said that I had an abcess and I needed a root canal, or he could just pull it right then.  Like I'm really going to have a frontish tooth pulled out of my head only to leave a glaring gap that advertises how close I really am to being a total redneck.  What does he think of me?  I opted for the root canal, partly because I didn't want Cute Dentist to see me with a big gap in my smile. If he was an ugly dentist that I didn't care about I might have thought more about having the tooth pulled.  But I want Cute Dentist to think I'm classy. When Mitch goes in, Cute Dentist talks to him about teeth whitening, and lets him run the Pandora music, and spoons him in the dentist chair, and just generally loves him the way I yearn to be loved by him.  Mitch says it's because he knows that the only time I will ever go to the dentist is for emergency procedures and I will have only the bare minimum done because I HATE to have my teeth worked on so much.  Cute Dentist is probably pretty sure that I will never be in again, so why bother?  No spooning for me.

How can I love someone who is in a profession I hate so much?  Well, let me tell you.  For one thing, he is super cute which is a plus and a minus.  I don't really want cute guys to see me cry and smell the smell of my abcessed teeth, but what can I do?  On the other hand, he is a very small man with tiny little monkey hands that fit into my mouth like they were made to be there.  And he is the first dentist in my entire life who has never caused me excruciating pain.  I've even been toying with the idea of a checkup.  Yeah, that's right, going to the dentist for no good reason at all. I haven't done that since I lived with my parents and my mom would trick me into getting into the car by telling me we were going someplace fun, and then we'd end up at the dentist.  But since I've been seeing my new dentist, I've been back THREE times in the past five years or so.  That is amazingly often for me.  And it's all because of Dentist Boyfriend.

The Head of our Fathers or God Bless A-Mitch-ica

This is what happens when we get cash:

Oh my god...