Tuesday, January 18, 2011


This is the singer Cee Lo Green.  He was on Saturday Night Live last weekend with my nemesis, Gwyneth Paltrow.  I would KILL for Cee Lo's teeth.  They are so large and white and straight and LARGE!  I love big teeth.  I think they are the most attractive thing a person can have and if I had the money and didn't have the crippling fear of all things dental, I would get work done to make my teeth look bigger and whiter and straighter.  Hilary Duff apparently agrees with me because she had her teeth done and although I love her new teeth, I think she may have over-done it:

(Only feed her carrots with a flat hand)

They were pretty good before, but as a lover of big teeth, I understand her wanting them even BIGGER.  You know who else has a nice big set of choppers?  Denzel Washington:

I photoshopped a picture of myself a long time ago and I changed my face in all the ways I would in real life if plastic surgery was cheap and painless.  I enlarged my eyes, minimized my chin, and enbiggened my teeth.  SO PRETTY!


  1. it's as though i'm looking at a picture of heidi klum.

    i especially like that you enhanced the bird's eye too. (and if that's not enhanced, you might want to get that professionally looked at.)

  2. i have big teeth, but i think they look stupid on me. i tell everyone i know that AS SOOOOOOON as i am rich, i'm getting these huge-ass chompers shaved down to nubs and i'm getting blindingly white, small-ish PERFECT veneers.

    i want my teeth to be so white they glow in the gd dark! :D

  3. I love big teeth too! It started with Nancy the IceSkater...

  4. Jess, I'm sure you're big teeth don't look stupid. Big teeth look good on everyone! I bet lots of people are jealous of you. I know I am!

  5. My husband and I have always thought that Hilary and Hayley Duff were the same person.

  6. I am laughing my ass off!

    I never noticed that about Hilary! Mr. Ed!!!

  7. I'm convinced that Cee Lo had his teeth done. Go and look at early-ish performances of Crazy and look at the Fuck You video -- his teeth used to stick out and the incisors were bigger than the front teeth. Now he has beautiful straight even teeth. He looks great, but obviously he some of the big bucks from Crazy to fix up the image some. I have no idea why this is important to me at all.

  8. I love big teeth too. To me the bigger they are the sexy they are.


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