I'm so very versatile...

I woke up this morning not feeling the best because I am having a mid-life crisis.  Why?  Oh, because I'm 41, I'm a substitute teacher (OMG), I've never lost the weight I swore I would lose, I have disgusting night sweats/farts and facing all these facts is sobering, to say the least.  Then I got on line and saw that Angie at Angie Uncovered has passed on the Versatile Blogger award to me.

Thanks Angie!  Actually, to be perfectly honest, when I saw what she wrote about me I thought "Omg, that is so sweet!  Oh crap, now what do I have to do?"  because that is just the kind of person I am and as a blogger, I'm not all that versatile.  I'm kind of a one trick pony.  Maybe this is kind of like getting awarded Miss Congeniality in a beauty contest, or winning a "participant" ribbon at school track and field day.

So, the conditions on getting the Versatile Blogger award are to acknowledge the person who gave it to me with some nice words, tell five little known facts about myself, and then pass the award on to five worthy bloggers.  So here goes.

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Angie

I got wind of Angie's blog through The Fred Effect.  He really likes her so I thought I'd check her out.  I like her too.  She's funny and irreverent and always makes me think.  She's feisty and she puts her kids in laundromat dryers if they get lippy.  

You gotta respect a lady who has the cojones to do that!  She's also written some beautiful things on her blog like this, that I find inspiring. Check out Angie!  

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Five little known facts about me

1. I always put the salt in the pepper shaker and the pepper in the salt shaker. I don't do it on purpose but when I fill new ones I always think, "okay, I did this wrong last time and I was sure I was right.  Do the opposite of what you think," and then I do it again and never change it because they never run out at the same time.  So if you ever come to my house for a meal expect to shake the shit out of the pepper shaker to get five measly flakes, and expect to get enough unwanted salt on your food from one little shake to make you thirsty for a week. 

2. I once fed my whole family a turkey that when I took it out of the packaging I was pretty sure was past it's prime because of the over powering dead-body smell.  I just cooked it longer than usual.  It was delicious and nobody got sick, but also, nobody appreciated it when I told them I was sure the turkey was rotten before I cooked it.  Lesson: keep your trap shut when you serve rotten yet delicious food to people.  Ignorance is, apparently, bliss.  

3.  My sisters and I stole a bus-tour in Washington D.C.  The bus was a double-decker open-top and the website said that it was a "hop on hop off" type tour.  You buy a ticket for 31 dollars and then you can hop on or off any of their busses all day.  We hopped on and nobody was there to take any money.  We toured for about an hour and then hopped off.  I felt more invigorated than guilty.  I think this might lead to a life of crime.

4.  When I was about eight years old I used to put super-balls in my tube tops because I was sure I was convincing the whole neighborhood that I was in the midst of puberty.  I can't believe the confidence I had that I was fooling everyone.  Turns out I wasn't really fooling anyone because not only was it obvious that a scrawny second grader isn't in puberty, but I wasn't very careful about making sure the superballs were the same size or that they were even.  People probably just thought it was a clever place to keep my balls.

5.  I love to pick things and peel things which is not a little known fact about me, but what is a little known fact is that when Sam was little and would get scrapes or bug bites, he would never EVER pick the scabs and if left to his own devices would let them heal on their own until the scab fell off (can you imagine?) When he was sleeping I would sneak into his room and pick the scabs that I had spotted that were totally ready to be picked.  I'm not proud of it, but if he wasn't on to me, and if he still got as many scabs, I would do it again.  

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And the Award goes to...

1.  Anne at Life Is Good because she is my friend, and I love her and I love reading her blog.  She is a great mom and wife and is honest and funny and positive.  

2.  Kady at A Lady Reveals Nothing because she has just about the funniest blog I've ever read. Her blog is about her life of travels and adventures, tampons and poop, her crazy family and her adorable roommate.

3.  Jane of Jane's Junk and Treasures.  Her blog is about decorating and organizing.  She's funny and has great taste and does some amazing projects.  She hasn't been blogging that much lately because she's busy being a good daughter, but she'll be back and when she is, check her out.  

4.  Lawrence at The Lawrence and Julie and Julia Project.  I'm giving him the Versatile Blogger award ironically because of the ridiculous corner he has painted himself into blog-wise.  He is watching the movie Julie and Julia every day for a year and blogging about it, much like Julie Powell made a recipe from Julia Child's cookbook every day for a year and blogged about it.  He's almost to the end and he's losing his mind.  

5.  A. from Milk and Cake.  I don't know if she wants me to put her name on the blog because it isn't even on her blog, so I just put A.  I stumbled on her blog a few years ago by pushing Next Blog and I've read her ever since.  She is very Versatile!  She blogs about her family, her job, her projects, food etc, etc.  I especially love the projects she does.  She's very creative and I would love it if she would come to my house and make me some stuff.