Remember yesterday when I told you that Sam caught a snake for Kira and she put it in a bucket and then it escaped? Today we found it. It was curled up at the bottom of the basement stairs. So cute! It was kind of cold down there so he was really easy to catch. I wonder how he spent his 24 hours of freedom in my house?
I imagine that soon after he got out of the bucket he slithered into the kitchen and got in the fridge and slithered through all the food, pooping in the butter and and peeing on top of all the diet coke cans. I wouldn't be too terribly surprised to find a disgusting shed skin in the left over baked beans. I bet he got out of the fridge then and took a little tour through the coffee pot and over all the silverware. Then I suppose he moseyed into the bathroom and coiled around my toothbrush for a while and then snuggled up and took a nap among my maxi-pads.
When we all went to bed and the house was dark and quiet, I imagine he got a little chilly so he was seeking some heat. I bet he slithered into my bed when I was asleep and took a little rest in my gaping mouth. Nice and toasty! I probably accidentally swallowed him and he slithered through my entire digestive tract, grateful to emerge in the morning. Best sunrise of his life! Then he probably slithered over every single surface that I clean. Now I have to clean the snake germs off every single thing in the house. You never know how much you don't want snakes loose in your house until there is a snake loose in your house.