Thursday, September 1, 2011

New School Year

Sam and I went to his high school orientation last night.  He starts school next Tuesday.  I am so happy and relieved he is out of middle school.  Middle school is the worst place in the world after prison and concentration camps.  I can't believe we send kids there.  Kids that age should not be with other kids that age.  I don't know what the solution to the problem is.  Don't ask me, I just recognize the problem and complain about it.  I don't want to think of solutions.  Why do I have to do everything anyway?  Huh?  Can't you come up with solutions sometimes?  Geez.

So anyway, one of the teachers came up to Sam and said, "And you are?" and he said, "Your worst nightmare."  Yeah, I couldn't believe it either.  Sam is about the mildest, most vanilla person in the world so to hear that come out of his mouth was surprising.  The teacher wasn't even fazed.  She smiled and said, "It's going to be a long year.  For you."

I'm really jealous that Sam is going to high school.  I loved high school.  He gets to take computers in a really nice lab, he gets to take Spanish from a woman who looks incredibly like Peggy Hill, he gets to read Romeo and Juliet in English class.... sigh.  Lucky.

Kira, on the other hand is just starting middle school.  This is the sweet little child who just last week thought "pecker" was a bird's beak and nothing but a bird's beak.  Over the next three years she will learn countless ugly slang words for genitalia; she will either see, experience, (or perpetrate) bullying; she will see, experience (or perpetrate) sexual harassment; she will hear creative swears that she will be compelled to come home and tell me about because one of her favorite things to tell me is, "I have to tell you something but I have to swear for it."  I wish I could just plug information into a Matrix like brain portal on the back of her neck so she would know everything she would need to know to go to high school and then send her to high school instead of subjecting her to middle school.  But I suppose it is a rite of passage?  I have to try to convince myself of that so I don't feel bad for subjecting her to it.


  1. Dana McKibbage WaldbilligSeptember 1, 2011 at 10:42 AM

    I happen to support homeschooling for all the reasons you listed, but wish that homeschooling was cooler! Why DO we put all those hormone-laced, mentally deficient, judgement-impaired, soft-fleshy humans together and hope they come out at the other end unscathed?! What are we thinking? We sent Serra to Catholic school through 8th grade, thinking she'd be somewhat protected from the aformentioned crap. WRONG. I think it was actually worse. I do know that the shock of public high school nearly put us all in a family-sized rubber room in Miller Dwan. Anyway, good luck Kira! Don't get crazy on us. And Sam's off to a good start I see.

  2. Maybe Sam will be lucky. It sounds like his teacher has a sense of humor.

  3. I'm just so glad I was able to experience middle school with your younger sister Beth, who molded my character by throwing me in the garbage can. Every day.

  4. Oh, I"ve missed you, too.

    Your redesign is wonderful: so organized and grown up looking.

    All 3 of mine are in school this year.

    I could be lonely but I"m working PT during the day now.

    So, it keeps me from crying big fat tears into my Cheerios.

    Good to see you!!! And thank you, for saying hello.

    I love your posts.


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