Nyquil hangover

I have the worst cold in the world. I feel like I'm breathing through a coffee stirrer, my throat feels like I drank lava (HOT lava). I took Nyquil last night because I LOVE Nyquil. I took the recommended dose, one full dosage cup, but I think it was too much because I still feel it and it does NOT feel good the day after. I think that particular dosage must really be for a 350 pound alcoholic with the metabolism of a hummingbird. It feels like when I was sleeping someone took out my lungs and stuffed dirty, soggy dishrags in them, and while they were out my rib cage got run over by a bus with tire chains on it. My brain feels like it was injected with Novacaine and today my whole body feels like your lip feels when the Novacaine starts wearing off. I feel like I look like this:

No, it's worse than that, it's this:

Nyquil must be a gateway drug because I can't wait until bedtime to take more.