Friday, April 6, 2012

F is for, "For Corn's Sake! It's time for a New Poll Question!"

Yes, it's time for a new question.  Last week's question, "Would you rather fly across the Pacific on a crowded plane with a one year old, or eat a delicious burger made from cat meat," had interesting results.  I personally would much MUCH rather eat cat meat.  If it was prepared properly, it would be delicious and then I could avoid the twelve hours of flop sweat and frustration I would have to endure to transport a toddler across the ocean.  A good meal or life-sucking frustration.  I think the choice is obvious, but you guys disagree.  Some of you said you would bring along noise cancelling headphones.  But what about when the baby did that "I'm-boneless" slide and slipped out of your lap?  Then what would you do? Because you know he/she would do that about ten thousand times during the flight.  And if I was on the plane and your one-year-old was wailing and you were sitting back, happy as a clam with your noise canceling head phones, how long do you think it would take for me to rip those off your head and use them myself.  Nobody would stick up for you.  They'd just wish they thought of it before I did.  You guys chose the wrong answer!

Here's the new question:

Would you rather...

Use a litter box exclusively in private for a year
You'd have your very own box, you could clean it or change the litter as much as you want, but it's a litter box, you'd have to do everything that comes along with going in a litter box, like squatting, kicking some litter over your product, and using the scoot-your-anus-across-the-carpet method of wiping.  (You better stick to hard food that year.)



OR

Use a toilet in front of a crowd one time
One time and it's over.  One time, but it's a multi-wiper.

"WIPE WIPE WIPE WIPE!"


Vote at the top of the sidebar!

19 comments:

  1. Hey look! I figured out how to have threaded comments!

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    1. Oh my god! You are super duper blogger extraordinaire! Extreme blogging at its best!

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  2. I say the first one. Just think of it like camping. Clarification: can I choose a newspaper litter box instead of clay litter in the littler box? Also, how big is this litter box? Small enough that it's like squatting over a toilet? Or big enough that you have to walk in and make sure you don't step on a previous time?

    I'm thinking about this way too much.

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    1. I haven't thought that deeply about it, but I suppose you could just use it as a toilet sized squatter. Yes, I don't see why you couldn't use newspaper, but if you are thinking of cheating and using some of your litter as toilet paper, then you lose, and you have to poop in front of a crowd.

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    2. What if I still did the scoot across the ground thing, but I did it in the litter box? If not, then yes, I'll poop in public. But not until I've had a ton of stomach upsetting Mexican food. Hey, if I'm going to be embarrassed, everyone's going to be uncomfortable.

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    3. I suppose you could scoot in the litter box. Just no using hands!

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  3. Replies
    1. Nothing. Why? You didn't say what you'd pick. I think you'd pick option number 2. Or one. I don't know. Why don't you tell me.

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  4. I picked private litter. I'd probably get performance anxiety otherwise.

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    1. I would get performance anxiety too. I almost can't even go in stalls in women's bathrooms.

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  5. Ok I would pick the one time public because what if I need to go while I'm at work or at the mall. Would I have to tote my litter box all around with me? That right there is a no.

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  6. Good point, I didn't think of that. I suppose if you were at the mall you could go to the pet store?

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  7. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  8. This is a total no-brainer. A year is a freakin' LONG TIME!! Get it overwith one horrific time in public and be done with it. Plus you'd give the crowd a story to tell for a long time. For someone who likes to TALK about pooping so much, I can't BELIEVE you'd have that much of a problem doing it ONCE in public!!

    (Sorry, deleted my last comment because I said "once horrific time". They really should just let you edit your comments....)

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  9. A year IS a really long time. Meanwhile, even the most stubborn of poops is going to take a half-hour, max. You could totally engage the audience, do a little stand-up (not literally, of course) and get some banter going while you're brewing.

    I can't think of anything that is not gross about litter boxes.

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  10. Litter box. I would choose my litter carefully. :D

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  11. Remember, everyone in the audience will be videotaping you and posting it on YouTube.

    I still choose public pooping one time. I need to WIPE.

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  12. I actually have nightmares about open bathrooms (rows and rows of toilets but no partitions). I'm sure that after a few months of litterboxing I'll have developed a technique akin to wiping. You public poopers amaze me - I'd totally be in the crowd!

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I would love your comments.